WHERE:Actors Company(The Little Theater) 916 N. Formosa Av
WHY: In this solo, sometimes musical dramedy, Becca Lustgarten plays Auntie B., an Upper West Side advice columnist whose outward expression is elegant, highly refined, almost anachronistic. As a self-proclaimed dating guru, her advice is sharp, hilarious and highly relevant. Over the course of the play, Auntie B. paints a picture of her perfect marriage to the perfect man, but it becomes apparent there’s something she is hiding from us, and herself. The fun begins to unravel as reality interrupts her opining on other’s lives. We find that we, the audience, are in the fact in the midst of her loss and unique expression of grief. Content warning: conversations about suicide.
A couple years ago, Kacie Rogers was anonymously nominated for the Free The Arts Shay Fellowship, a paid opportunity to write and develop a solo piece. She seized the chance, and wrote a five minute submission piece. A few weeks later, she found out that she had gotten the fellowship. And thus—her solo show I Sell Windowswas born.
I Sell Windows, co-produced by Outside In Theatre & Bottle Tree Theatre (Kacie is one of the company’s co-founders), is an autobiographical collection of stories and reflections written and performed by Kacie. The anecdotes work through an artist’s experience of frustration and guilt, and let us be privy to a journey of self-discovery through grief.
After seeing a performance of I Sell Windows, I called Kacie to chat about the process of putting it together. As the show’s writer, producer and performer, Kacie and her personal collection of experiences are its driving force. Among other things, we talk about theater as therapy, the joys of working with great creative collaborators and writing about the things that scare you most.
Elana Luo: Let’s start at the beginning. Tell me about coming up with the idea for this show.
Kacie Rogers: What I was always interested in was writing all of the scariest things I could think of that I’ve never thought I could say in front of a roomful of people. Stories that were the most interesting, or formative for me in one way or another. So that was my approach. Because theater, in so many ways, has been such a home for me, and such a place where I have channeled a countless amount of emotions through characters. I just always wondered what it would be like to stand up there and do it as myself. I think it’s an act of bravery. I thought it would be very cathartic.
Kacie Rogers in “I Sell Windows” – photo by JJ Hawkins
But I was also terrified that people would hate me. And so I was like, well, I need a collaborator. If I’m going to write all these scary things, I need a collaborator who I can trust, and I will always know that she loves me enough. There’s nothing too scary for me to say in front of her.
Elana: Was that Jaquita Ta’le, the director?And she’s also a co-founder of your company, Bottle Tree Theatre?
Kacie: Yes. She would guide me to what was interesting to her and away from things that didn’t seem like they were serving the narrative. I remember for a long time she was like, we just have to find a container.
Elana: An umbrella of sorts.
Kacie: Yeah. One thing I did trust is that all these stories are coming from one common place. That common place is me. Ultimately, all we are as human beings are walking stories. So at some point if I just write down all these stories, I’m going to find a narrative somewhere, linear or non-linear. I am a narrative. And so I just kind of allowed myself to to write whatever and then trust that we would find a container.
Elana: And what did you find?
Kacie: It’s so interesting—the container ended up being window selling, yes, but ultimately, it’s the death of my grandfather. A common factor of a lot of the stories was the guilt and frustration I feel around being imperfect, and unforgiveness around missing my grandfather’s death because of my desire to serve my artistry rather than going to serve my family. That was a huge revelation for me.
Kacie Rogers in “I Sell Windows” – photo by JJ Hawkins
Elana: Once you had all these stories and their container, what was developing the piece like?
Kacie: It’s so deeply personal, every single part of it. It’s really hard. There’s a lot of self doubt that is all over this process, because it is me–performing me, writing me, about me. So it’s very, very vulnerable. And you constantly want to change things, because you’re like, maybe people aren’t responding to me, you know? Maybe I should “do me” differently. And that’s really hard.
Elana: Has there been anything that has helped you deal with that?
Kacie: I think I’m actively learning to deal with it. I have the best team around me. Like really top to bottom. Jaquita, Jessica [Hanna, Producing Artistic Director of Outside In Theatre] and Chelsea [Boyd, Co-Founder of Bottle Tree Theatre]; Arlo [Sanders], Paul [Hungerford] and Matthew [Pitner] from Outside In; my stage manager Arielle [Hightower] and my puppeteers [Brittaney Talbot and Perry Daniel]… all of those people are so affirming at every step of the way. They have been so selfless in all the ways that they are willing to throw themselves into the work because they believe in it so deeply. And if anything has helped me to quell those doubts, it’s been looking around me and being so humbled and so encouraged by the endless amounts of work and heaps of appreciation that they have gifted me with.
Elana: That’s beautiful.
Kacie: I’m so thankful. But outside of that, I think it’s really important to accept that your thing does not have to be for everybody. You can be fully you, and your thing can be fully your thing, and be amazing at being your thing, and still not be for somebody else. And that’s okay. I think that’s a big learning curve. So that’s the lesson I’m currently trying to speak into myself.
Jessica Hanna (Producer), Jaquita Ta’le (Director), Kacie Rogers, Chelsea Boyd (Producer), Brittaney Talbot (Puppet Designer_Performer), Perry Daniels (Puppet Performer), Arielle Hightower (Stage Manager) after “I Sell Windows” opening – photo by Mallury P
Elana: Moving along in the process, will you tell me a little about producing the show? How did it make it onstage at Outside In?
Kacie: In 2022, Jacquita found an opportunity with Greenway Court Theatre. They were looking to help produce a show, so she submitted I Sell Windows. We didn’t get that opportunity, but they gave us another opportunity to do a one-night-only performance as a part of their Jam Poetry Festival. So I did that last year.
And Jessica Hanna—she directed me in a play years ago and we just kept in touch because we’re both big theater gals. I knew Jess had taken several shows to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, so I invited her to a coffee to pick her brain about what that process is like. It just so happened that the one-night-only presentation of I Sell Windows was within the next couple of weeks, so I invited her to see the show. She ended up coming, and I remember her walking out and being like, “let’s meet this week.” From there, she was like, “I’m starting a theater company. I want to produce your show. I want to give it a run and then I want to take it to Edinburgh!”
Elana: Wow.
Kacie: It was just like that. It was one of those dreamy meetings where everything you ever want to happen, happened.
Bottle Tree Theatre’s Chelsea Boyd, Kacie Rogers and Jaquita Ta’le – photo by JJ Hawkins
Elana: You’ve been lucky, but you’ve also been prepared.
Kacie: Chelsea Boyd always says, “All things will come together with ease and joy.” We just kind of keep doing the work, showing up and taking the opportunities that fall in front of us, and as we have it, truly all things have kind of come together with ease and joy. And I’m so thankful for that.
A great gift is to be reminded of the power of stillness. The show opens with a live cellist, violinist and pianist while Anabella stands looking at the audience. This brave moment seems to last an eternity; you begin to feel uncomfortable and immediately know that this show will not spare your heart. Through her use of ballet en pointe, song, multiple characters (all performed by Anabella) and modern dance, Anabella captures the heart of the audience with her penetrating eyes and daring ability to share painful truths with intense intimacy. She has a keen sense of humor, and takes us on a journey of youthful innocence, trauma and survival. Tackling issues that many don’t come back from, Anabella shows us that art is a constant saviour; it will always give us new breath, a new life on our own terms. Go see this show and hope you can get in!
WHERE: Studio/Stage 120 N. Western Av, Los Angeles 90004
WHY:
We are living in times when – now, more than ever – it is vital that we share experiences that can save lives. For too long, mental health has carried a negative stigma and a stamp of shame, discussed behind closed doors. Jessie refuses to live this kind of life and brings the audience into her personal experience of living with bipolar and schizophrenia hallucinations. Her fearless humor and directness draws the audience in, not through pity but hope. The original songs brought to life with Jessie’s beautiful voice, and her dancing, are gifts to the audience as she reveals how she’s been able to thrive and live her best life! GO! This is a celebration of the mind, body and heart. A yummy example of how much you can bear even when you think you can’t keep going. Keep going!
If there is anyone who deserves the term woman on the fringe, it’s Jacquetta Szathmari. I’ve known her since the first year of Fringe, and she is one of my favorite artists to see every year. First she brought the storytelling to stage piece That’s Funny, You Didn’t Sound Black on the Phone. By the way, she never utters those words in her show. This year she’s workshopping a new piece about a burlesque dancer and magician who meet in 1955 on the train to Vegas. Both female, both African-American, and both pursuing their dreams even as they must stick to the “Chitlin Circuit”. Let me just say that you’ve never thought about history more than watching a burlesque Harriet Tubman dance. More is below from the audience reaction/review I posted.
Watching this show, I found myself suspended somewhere between a guffaw and gasp of horror the entire time. Szathmari has an insane ability to draw you into these incredibly different characters’s greatest desires, teach some history and give a really good yank at your guts. A work-in-progress, I couldn’t stop thinking about it for hours afterwards, and honestly still don’t feel like I have fully digested it. It was such a great meal that I plan to go back for seconds.
I strongly suggest you see this show, and in true form to its setting of Vegas, have a stiff drink or two beforehand.
