WHY: Spunky, sassy, and sincere, Sam opens our hearts to the adventures of an aspiring actress in Hollywood, striving to find her artistic purpose. Labrecque embodies the quintessential fringe artist—bold, innovative, and deeply passionate. With meta musical numbers, composed/keys by the multi-talented Edith Mudge, captivating dance moves, humor, and a heartfelt narrative, she paved the way for a meaningful realization for both herself and her audience.
June is here and “Women on the Fringe” are again onstage!
There is nothing quite like the buzz that’s created during the Hollywood Fringe. It is a time filled with risk-taking, courage, hope and independent artists creating new work by any means necessary. Each year, I ask women writers a new series of questions influenced by the Proust Questionnaire and Bernard Pivot’s French series, “Bouillon de Culture.” The goal is to understand the artist’s work and their full nature while allowing them a space to reveal their authentic self. It is a great gift and a true honor to introduce women who will be presenting work in myriad genres, exploring a wide range of topics that allow us to examine who we are as individuals and as a society.
Introducing Joy Regullano and her show, “Body Count”
Joy Regullano
Constance: What do you hope audience members take away after experiencing your show?
Joy: I hope that people learn at least a little something about themselves from my story. Maybe a little a-ha moment of why their relationships ended the way they did or an insight into their own relationship with their parents or family. In my fantasy of fantasies, people who need help would feel inspired to get the help they need, whether it’s through reading one of my recommended books, going to therapy or something else. I also of course hope that they’ll be entertained and laugh.
Constance: What’s been your biggest challenge in terms of your development/creation process?
Joy: It’s such a deeply personal show – more personal than anything else I’ve written and shared publicly, and that’s saying a lot because almost everything I write is very personal. So there’s a part of me that fears that anyone who is mentioned in the show will come to see it, haha! I’ve also been pushed by multiple people to go more into the dramatic and emotional, and as a comedian that’s not always my favorite place to go. But I hope that exploring those areas has helped make it more profound.
Constance: What are you enjoying most as you create your show?
Joy: It’s always really fun to see what the audience laughs at. What the audience responds to. Especially when it’s something I didn’t even think was funny. It’s a feedback loop – their reaction inspires me to tweak the show, which then hopefully causes them to laugh even more. I suppose what I’m speaking of is the workshopping process. I also enjoy connecting with people after they see the show and hearing what they resonate with, whether it’s a relationship with their parents, a way they’ve moved through the world in their romantic relationships, or something else.
Constance: What has been the most surprising discovery?
Joy: Just how many people resonate with what I talk about in my show? A lot of it is such a taboo topic, that it’s not like it’s the typical everyday conversation that always comes up. So I’m really glad to be part of an effort to normalize talking about these issues.
Constance: The work will be given away soon. How does that feel?
Joy: It’s scary!! I already feel the postpartum depression. And once you give it away, you can’t control how people take it. But it will also feel fun, connecting, and… relieving?? Haha. How long have you been sitting with this work? I’ve thought about writing something around this topic for a few years, but I think I needed some distance away from the events that actually happened in my life that inspired it before I was ready to shape it into a public show. So maybe like … 5 years? haha.
Constance: Why Fringe? Why this year?
Joy: I absolutely loved my last experience with Fringe in 2019 with my musical SUPPORTIVE WHITE PARENTS and wanted to do it again! I loved all the “fringeships” I made, and I love the community, and I found it to be an incredibly connecting experience. I had just come out of a solo show class at East West Players with a draft of this show, and it was either do Fringe now or wait until next year, which felt like an awfully long time to wait. So I did drag my feet a little bit, but I eventually pulled the trigger.
Constance: Anything else that must be said – please add!
Joy: Hope to see you at the show! I’m on IG @joyregullano and @bodycountsoloshow.n Our first show on Sun 6/9 @ 11pm is PWYC. No code is necessary! (And if you miss me at Hollywood Fringe this year, I’m taking it to NYC for a couple of show dates in late June as part of Pan Asian Rep’s NuWorks Festival! Check out the program here: https://www.panasianrep.org/nuworks-2024.)
June is here and “Women on the Fringe” are again onstage!
There is nothing quite like the buzz that’s created during the Hollywood Fringe. It is a time filled with risk-taking, courage, hope and independent artists creating new work by any means necessary. Each year, I ask women writers a new series of questions influenced by the Proust Questionnaire and Bernard Pivot’s French series, “Bouillon de Culture.” The goal is to understand the artist’s work and their full nature while allowing them a space to reveal their authentic self. It is a great gift and a true honor to introduce women who will be presenting work in myriad genres, exploring a wide range of topics that allow us to examine who we are as individuals and as a society.
A couple years ago, Kacie Rogers was anonymously nominated for the Free The Arts Shay Fellowship, a paid opportunity to write and develop a solo piece. She seized the chance, and wrote a five minute submission piece. A few weeks later, she found out that she had gotten the fellowship. And thus—her solo show I Sell Windowswas born.
I Sell Windows, co-produced by Outside In Theatre & Bottle Tree Theatre (Kacie is one of the company’s co-founders), is an autobiographical collection of stories and reflections written and performed by Kacie. The anecdotes work through an artist’s experience of frustration and guilt, and let us be privy to a journey of self-discovery through grief.
After seeing a performance of I Sell Windows, I called Kacie to chat about the process of putting it together. As the show’s writer, producer and performer, Kacie and her personal collection of experiences are its driving force. Among other things, we talk about theater as therapy, the joys of working with great creative collaborators and writing about the things that scare you most.
Elana Luo: Let’s start at the beginning. Tell me about coming up with the idea for this show.
Kacie Rogers: What I was always interested in was writing all of the scariest things I could think of that I’ve never thought I could say in front of a roomful of people. Stories that were the most interesting, or formative for me in one way or another. So that was my approach. Because theater, in so many ways, has been such a home for me, and such a place where I have channeled a countless amount of emotions through characters. I just always wondered what it would be like to stand up there and do it as myself. I think it’s an act of bravery. I thought it would be very cathartic.
Kacie Rogers in “I Sell Windows” – photo by JJ Hawkins
But I was also terrified that people would hate me. And so I was like, well, I need a collaborator. If I’m going to write all these scary things, I need a collaborator who I can trust, and I will always know that she loves me enough. There’s nothing too scary for me to say in front of her.
Elana: Was that Jaquita Ta’le, the director?And she’s also a co-founder of your company, Bottle Tree Theatre?
Kacie: Yes. She would guide me to what was interesting to her and away from things that didn’t seem like they were serving the narrative. I remember for a long time she was like, we just have to find a container.
Elana: An umbrella of sorts.
Kacie: Yeah. One thing I did trust is that all these stories are coming from one common place. That common place is me. Ultimately, all we are as human beings are walking stories. So at some point if I just write down all these stories, I’m going to find a narrative somewhere, linear or non-linear. I am a narrative. And so I just kind of allowed myself to to write whatever and then trust that we would find a container.
Elana: And what did you find?
Kacie: It’s so interesting—the container ended up being window selling, yes, but ultimately, it’s the death of my grandfather. A common factor of a lot of the stories was the guilt and frustration I feel around being imperfect, and unforgiveness around missing my grandfather’s death because of my desire to serve my artistry rather than going to serve my family. That was a huge revelation for me.
Kacie Rogers in “I Sell Windows” – photo by JJ Hawkins
Elana: Once you had all these stories and their container, what was developing the piece like?
Kacie: It’s so deeply personal, every single part of it. It’s really hard. There’s a lot of self doubt that is all over this process, because it is me–performing me, writing me, about me. So it’s very, very vulnerable. And you constantly want to change things, because you’re like, maybe people aren’t responding to me, you know? Maybe I should “do me” differently. And that’s really hard.
Elana: Has there been anything that has helped you deal with that?
Kacie: I think I’m actively learning to deal with it. I have the best team around me. Like really top to bottom. Jaquita, Jessica [Hanna, Producing Artistic Director of Outside In Theatre] and Chelsea [Boyd, Co-Founder of Bottle Tree Theatre]; Arlo [Sanders], Paul [Hungerford] and Matthew [Pitner] from Outside In; my stage manager Arielle [Hightower] and my puppeteers [Brittaney Talbot and Perry Daniel]… all of those people are so affirming at every step of the way. They have been so selfless in all the ways that they are willing to throw themselves into the work because they believe in it so deeply. And if anything has helped me to quell those doubts, it’s been looking around me and being so humbled and so encouraged by the endless amounts of work and heaps of appreciation that they have gifted me with.
Elana: That’s beautiful.
Kacie: I’m so thankful. But outside of that, I think it’s really important to accept that your thing does not have to be for everybody. You can be fully you, and your thing can be fully your thing, and be amazing at being your thing, and still not be for somebody else. And that’s okay. I think that’s a big learning curve. So that’s the lesson I’m currently trying to speak into myself.
Jessica Hanna (Producer), Jaquita Ta’le (Director), Kacie Rogers, Chelsea Boyd (Producer), Brittaney Talbot (Puppet Designer_Performer), Perry Daniels (Puppet Performer), Arielle Hightower (Stage Manager) after “I Sell Windows” opening – photo by Mallury P
Elana: Moving along in the process, will you tell me a little about producing the show? How did it make it onstage at Outside In?
Kacie: In 2022, Jacquita found an opportunity with Greenway Court Theatre. They were looking to help produce a show, so she submitted I Sell Windows. We didn’t get that opportunity, but they gave us another opportunity to do a one-night-only performance as a part of their Jam Poetry Festival. So I did that last year.
And Jessica Hanna—she directed me in a play years ago and we just kept in touch because we’re both big theater gals. I knew Jess had taken several shows to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, so I invited her to a coffee to pick her brain about what that process is like. It just so happened that the one-night-only presentation of I Sell Windows was within the next couple of weeks, so I invited her to see the show. She ended up coming, and I remember her walking out and being like, “let’s meet this week.” From there, she was like, “I’m starting a theater company. I want to produce your show. I want to give it a run and then I want to take it to Edinburgh!”
Elana: Wow.
Kacie: It was just like that. It was one of those dreamy meetings where everything you ever want to happen, happened.
Bottle Tree Theatre’s Chelsea Boyd, Kacie Rogers and Jaquita Ta’le – photo by JJ Hawkins
Elana: You’ve been lucky, but you’ve also been prepared.
Kacie: Chelsea Boyd always says, “All things will come together with ease and joy.” We just kind of keep doing the work, showing up and taking the opportunities that fall in front of us, and as we have it, truly all things have kind of come together with ease and joy. And I’m so thankful for that.
I did a couple of things this weekend that reminded me to revisit Don Miguel Ruiz’s “The Four Agreements”. The first agreement “Be impeccable with your word”.
Here are the Four Agreements, and the most important is the agreement we make with ourselves.
The first situation was a misunderstanding on a specified date for a new yoga class. The class kicked off on Saturday, June 1st, and there wasn’t an instructor to lead the class. A phone call with my supervisor starts with his apology for not reminding me about the change in the schedule. Surprised, I said that the class doesn’t start till June 12th. He doesn’t know where that date came from. He’s been swamped with many things and kindly reminded me that going forward, every Saturday, there is a 9:30 am class.
After getting off the call I rechecked the text… Ooops. I made the mistake. It read June 1, 2024. I misread the numbers by stringing the 1-2 together in my first quick glance at the text. Funny thing is that he and I had had in person conversations about the class since he originally notified me by text. I said June 12th to which he didn’t react to.
I called my supervisor quickly, though there was a moment of hesitation, remorse and recoil on my part. I didn’t relish the idea of owning up to the problem. I was being mindless in reading the text in the first place. Not very yogi-like of a yoga teacher. “It’s on me,” I said to him, “I misread your text.” He graciously accepted my apology. We cleared up the air and set the expectations. That also touches on the 2nd agreement – “Don’t make assumptions”. I did the opposite by assuming I was correct on the date. I also stumped on the 4th agreement “Always do your best”.
My Jenga tower just came crashing down, but still partially standing as I was impeccable with my word on that incident.
The second situation was similar – a scheduling conflict. I texted someone to request for rescheduling an important meeting. I was conflicted to give a reason for the request for the change. I was assuming (again) that the person might think my reason as trivial. But, to me the reason was not trivial. I typed the words carefully and explained the situation. I held my breath (sort of) for half an hour. The person responded and said, “let me check the calendar, I will get back to you shortly”.
I felt deeply relieved that the person responded quickly for a Sunday afternoon, and that the request was viable. The best part was I didn’t lie, and that felt extremely good.
I am dedicating this blog in memory of Erica H. Bennett for her original blog post of “The Four Agreements” – https://lafpi.com/2015/05/labor/ . She wrote it on May 29th, 2015. The date was 9 years ago, last Wednesday. Nancy Beverly commented to say she has the Four Agreements posted at her desk. Thank you for your Erica blog. RIP.
We’ve all probably experienced times when we haven’t been treated fairly.
Remember the TV game show “Let’s Make a Deal”? Sometimes the player would choose a door that would reveal a goat, instead of a brand new car.
One of my hardest experience, since Bruno’s accident and dealing with the aftermath of that event, was to face up to someone in power for bullying. In hindsight, I had no choice. I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t speak up.
Even if there are laws to help protect human rights, it still takes one person to speak up to make the law effective It could be a witness who steps up to bring about transparency to the mistreatment of a human being by another; or the person themselves being victimized who says “Stop.”, “Enough!”. When I spoke up for myself, I felt an enormous relief. It was the most freeing experience I’ve had in a very long time since I started to shrink under the weight and pressure of the bullying.
I think it begins with being aware of the situation and accepting the “what is”. Sometimes, the situation can seem daunting and unbelievable. Denial of the ‘what is’ perpetuates the ongoing victimization. Awareness and accepting are key to bringing forth action.
Coming to a resolution is a long and tough road. But step by step, I work on being at peace with what’s at hand. I remind myself that It’s just this. Then, I can think and see my options and choose what is right for me.
My Mom texted a story to me today. A friend of hers went to the doctor with her son. The doctor said everything was fine. The mother and son went to the pharmacy at the mall to fill out a prescription. Afterwards, they walked around the mall and then the mother collapsed and died. My Mom attended the funeral today.
It makes me think that it does not matter whether I’ve been dealt a good hand, a bad hand, or nothing much at all – I just have to deal. Accept it and keep on dealing. I texted back my Mom and told her to keep on loving and that I love her.
I’ve run out of excuses to write something for this week’s blog. I’ve made too many trips to the kitchen from my writing chair. I’ve cleaned out my laundry basket and folded everything. I’ve done all the necessary correspondences and then some. Animals have been taken care of. What else? What else? Oh. I’ve got to practice guitar. High E string breaks, so now I have to change the strings. While I’m at it, I’ll clean the guitar – oiling the neck, brushing the spaces between the frets, wiping the pegs clean. All set, but now I have to practice yoga. I have a class to teach. I need coffee. Walk the dog first. I’m practicing everything else except writing.
I started agonizing about writing since that alert email flashed in my inbox last Friday. Subject line: Start of Blog Week. I’m paralyzed with performance anxiety that strikes at my heart. It’s ironic to me, because being a yoga teacher, I guide class participants to let go, use awareness and breath to get through the asanas. I’ve already held my breath in my chest during the past 186 words.
I’ve “figured it out”. My mind is controlling the outcome even before I’ve started. Does any of this resonate with anyone out there? Echo – echo – echo…
Hey it works! I did use my awareness and breath and the breath is flowing again, and I know it’s going to be ok. I can write. One of the metaphors I use in my yoga classes is Goldilocks. It has to be just right: Not too hard, not too soft. Not too hot, not too cold. Not too big, not too small. Ok cool. This gives me permission to just be myself: Just right. Just write.
Like other art forms, writing is a practice. For me, it is the hardest effort compared to meditation, yoga and guitar. There are other practices not always labeled as “artistic”, such as medical and legal practices (though to me any practice is an art form). A practice means showing up and being present.
During the first week of acting classes, the coach asked, what is difference between an amateur and a professional? From the American Heritage Dictionary:
Thirty years ago I lived in Salem, Oregon, working as an Information Technology professional. I left the bubble of Vancouver, BC and dove deep into a new environment in every sense of the word. The consulting company provided for a 30 day use of a car and free accommodation. Coming close to the end of this grace period, I found two cars to choose from, one was a practical Toyota Tercel and a medium luxury Saab (both second hand). The owner of the Tercel had a dog. The car was flea ridden to match the roller painted teal blue. The SAAB was a convertible. Imagine. I asked a friend which car I should choose, though I already knew in my heart of hearts which one I would buy. My friend’s response was “There’s not even a choice. You’re a professional now.”
Those words still ring in my ears now and then when coming to choices of “fun” versus “serious”. Should I get a fun car or a serious car? Sure, a convertible is fun, but fun to me was having cash in my pocket to explore and I didn’t need a convertible to do that. There were not any regrets with the Toyota. I drove it everywhere, even trips to Vancouver, BC and back to Salem with the gas pedal to the metal, especially during the uphill stretches through the Cascade mountains. There was the regularly planned stop at Olympia, Washington to cool down the engine. One morning, close to the end of my gig, I woke up and found the car crumpled, a victim of a hit and run. The insurance company paid me $100 less than what I paid for the car.
The Bhagavad Gita, noted as the primary source of yogic philosophy by B.K.S. Iyengar, compares the body to a chariot, the sense to the horses and the mind to the reins. “The intellect is the charioteer and the soul is the master of the chariot.”
Going back to the 90’s when I lived in Salem, I also discovered “Alice In Chains” (AIC). The album, “Jar of Flies” was my constant companion. I’ve been listening to AIC again, and unearthed my beginner’s mind approach to daily living. I’m listing to the album “Dirt”, an “intense” record as described by Jerry Cantrell (lead guitar, composer and vocals for AIC).
“Dirt” – Wikipedia – Retrospectively, the album has continued to receive acclaim, with Rolling Stone placing the album at No. 26 on its list of the “100 Greatest Metal Albums of All Time”.[11]Dirt was included in the 2005 book 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die.
There’s a freshness and enthusiasm to see how the day will unfold with my daily practice of yoga, meditation, guitar, reading and writing. I definitely could strengthen my writing practice, which I said earlier is the hardest of them all. Writing just demands all of me (flesh, blood, and bones and all the icky gooey stuff when you cut yourself open). Plus it’s slow and gives me time to second guess my second guesses. There’s always the opportunity to nullify the output (backspace, delete).
Writing is another form of self-expression. The other practices (a.k.a “distractions”) of yoga, guitar and house chores that take time away from writing is energy spent noodling in my head and heart, while keeping my hands busy. These expressions also inform my writing. I am able to give myself permission to relax in recognizing that this is my process to get me to the blank page to start pouring it all out: my doubts, vulnerabilities, found strength in my weaknesses, and allowing and accepting it all. Everyday is an opportunity for beginner’s mind which is the joy of being an amateur who practices their art for the joy of it. The seriousness of maintaining a household for survival needs requires a healthy balance of joy through creation in music, writing and yoga & meditation. Also, I’ve accepted that self-expression is not selfish. How can art be born without soulful expression in form?
I know what I should be working on. The deadline is Thursday next. But the new dining room carpet was just delivered and I need to see if the shade of sea glass green matches the wallpaper or figure out how to ship it back. And I need to find a sub for me at church next week if I want to invite people over for the Memorial Day Concert. I’m cold and should put on a sweater.
Stop. Focus. Write.
I think about all the stories I want to write. Worry about how long it will take to write them. Worry that my brain or body will give out before I get to them all. And if I’m that worried, why am I avoiding sitting down right now to create them?
The dishwasher needs to be unloaded. I need to get a stamp for that renewal envelope for the husband’s subscription of Track and Field news. The cat wants breakfast. Now. There are leaves on the patio that should be picked up before somebody steps on them and drags pieces into the house. Is the mini vacuum plugged in? I should cook the salmon today. I’ll have to walk over to the community garden to steal some parsley. Does anyone still have lemons on their tree? I need a nap. Or more tea. I’m cold. I should get up and zap the tea in the microwave. I have another zoom at one. I should be writing.
Did Sara agree to a phone call this afternoon? Why were the cherries at the farmer’s market $12 a pound? Will those tiny green tomatoes really ripen on the windowsill? Why did I forget the artichokes on the stove and burn them?
I’m cold. In May. Why am I cold?
That little amaryllis flower looks so happy. I guess I should go spray the roses. Again. Oh, yeah. I need orchid food. And some new hand towels. Maybe I’ll walk up to Target. Wish I’d changed the sheets before the husband made the bed.
What was it I was supposed to be doing?
Oh, yeah. Writing.
Kitty Felde writes the Fina Mendoza Mysteries series of middle grade novels. The Spanish version “Estado de la Unión” will be released August 1st.
This question – what defines an “important play” and what doesn’t? And do we, as playwrights, need to worry about this? It’s been…on my mind.
Yesterday I got to hear a reading of a play of mine that I hadn’t looked at in years. On a whim, I submitted The Sudden Urge to Jump for a new work series with Full Circle Players, a Riverside theatre company that is doing the good work in Riverside County to bring classic and new theatre to an area of SoCal that needs more theatre. (I grew up in the Inland Empire so I’m allowed to say this lol. Check them out in the area and support!)
The play takes place in a video store (that used to be a church) as two siblings try to pick up the pieces of their lives after their sister’s funeral. The sister may fall for the brother’s best friend in an vaguely enemies-to-lovers kind of way. The dead sister might monologue and try to control the story that is continuing after her death. There are a lot of movie references. A lot. It is ultimately about how we try to fit our lives so neatly into genres and categories and shape how things go…but that’s just not how this shit works.
I don’t know what made me specifically choose this play to submit to their call. Maybe I thought it was one of the most digestible, accessible plays I have, and knowing the Inland Empire like I do, I wanted to offer something that was…not alienating? I mean it’s about suicide, but it’s also a love story and there’s jokes so – wee! Maybe I knew that I’d never look at it again unless I had a real reason…and I hoped they’d give me a reason?
What came up for me really, as I was thinking about this play and doing a rewrite of it for the reading, was why I had kinda put it aside. I wrote the first draft of it in the first year I was in the Skylight Theatre PlayLab. It had a reading. And I remember feeling, in that group, that because it was a love story, that was at least vaguely a comedy, and was looking at things like human connection and depression…and maybe, possibly, because it was written by a (young at the time) woman, it didn’t feel…important? Despite it having a prominent storyline about suicide, it felt like fluff in the sea of other work being created in that group. And honestly, it felt like it set the tone for me for reactions in that group for the next few years as I wrote two other plays. Reactions from others, and self doubts and judgements within myself. Fluffy. Women problems. Working class problems. Not important.
So the play had another reading in Houston a year or two later. Both the original reading and the one in Houston had lovely responses. It was a crowd pleaser in general, the actors always had fun and felt connected. But still, I put it in a drawer. I decided that it was not worth investing time into, because it wasn’t about anything important.
When I look toward the “big” theatres, the ones we all aspire to be at, the gatekeeping contests and conferences, the dwindling new works development opportunities, it always seems like folks are looking for the next “important” play. The one, it seems, that is going to change the landscape of theater and American culture, that is going to solve climate change or racism or homophobia or misogyny, or, hell, cure cancer I guess. As if it is one voice that will be the hero, the savior, and not, instead, a diversity of voices in a rich ecosystem of society that will ultimately make a difference.
I write grants to pay bills, and this comes up a lot too. Every art project has to be solving some big problem and we need to show how we’re going to do that with the $500 grant. Solve the world’s problems with no money and no support. And then give us a 30 page report about it. So my mind is here all the time – trying to convince people why art is “important.” Why what I do is “important.” This happens all the time too in the theatre company I help run. Every show we ask these questions — why is this play important? Why are we doing this now?
I’m not saying it shouldn’t be part of our practice to ask these questions. We should know why we’re driven to do the things we spend so many years on! Having a purpose, a direction for our work is central to keeping ourselves focused and engaged and connected to the world. But twisting ourselves into knots to fit a box is not the way to good art. And convincing ourselves of our own importance is also NOT the way to good art or relationships or longevity.
But also…The Play That Goes Wrong is done everywhere and like…is that an important play? Please, I’d love to see an essay on that.
Do we only have room for fluffy slap stick and trauma porn? Is there nothing in between? Can we do some genre-mixing please?
I wrote a play last year that I thought had the real potential of an “important” play. It was ABOUT something real, a real problem, financial burdens, broken communities, the targeting of vulnerable women. I sent it out in earnest to the annual cycle of awards and conferences, which feel like the cost of being a playwright in this system. And usually I do this with very little expectation. Rejection, to me, is a Season. But this time…I had hope. I had an important play! If only someone would give me the space to develop it, I could change the world!
As one would expect, it got a few nods, a few pats on the head, and I’ll be traveling to Alaska in June for a reading at a conference. Cool! I’m grateful! And also…it’s not an important play, obviously.
Because I don’t know what an important play is. Nor can I, the playwright, be the judge of what that is, for my work. And I’m mad at myself for spending too much time worrying about whether that play, or any play of mine, fits into a box that is always shifting.
When it comes down to it, both of these plays are wildly not important. But they are important to me. They both were written not toward some person’s agenda, but toward my own obsession and curiosity about something. And ultimately a play will never be “important” if it is not important first to you. And frankly, we don’t get to decide what the play does in the world, or how people react to it. That’s not our fucking business. And I guess I’m a little tired of putting too much of my self worth on the validation of forces beyond my control.
So is the life of a writer.
When I sat in the reading of The Sudden Urge to Jump last night, I was reminded why I wrote it. I was delighted at my (slightly) younger self for writing it, for the little quirks of love and attraction I’m drawn to writing about, about the depression and frustrations I felt at the time, and how I still feel all these things. And that the only thing that made the play unimportant was my piss-poor attitude toward it.
Will the play ever get a production? I hope so. Will it ever win awards? Nah. Will it change the world if it does? Absolutely not. But the audience laughed at jokes, giggled nervously at the awkward romantic moments, and cackled or groaned or nodded at the endless movie references (I had chats about the pop culture nods with folks after). In the talk back, the playwright of the other play presented that night and I laughed at the way our plays were paired up, the parallel themes, the dead siblings in the plays, death and religion in general. the pop references, the way they did or did not speak to each other. In the words of one audience member, his play made them weep, and mine was charming. And I’m good with that.
I’m good with that also because I saw my dad laughing. And my mother, who often asks me to write something that is not so dark or pessimistic, who I partially wrote the play for (because love story!) she turned to me after the reading with a big smile on her face. And she said “That was so great!” She delighted in a happy ending, some hope, people taking a chance on each other. And you know what? That’s enough to make it an important play to me.
Go write your weird little love story. People need that too.
Welcome to the literary landscape of The Body’s Midnight by Tira Palmquist. This world premiere, a co-production of IAMA and Boston Court and directed by Jessica Kubzansky, is a delicately interwoven script with surprising, beautiful and challenging moments.
I read the script before the play opened, talked with Tira and Jessica, and visited a rehearsal — all to discover how Tira’s playwriting and collaboration process influenced the production. As we know, creative generation is primarily an individual undertaking, but with this complex project, I wanted to hear and understand more about Tira’s sourcing of material and development.
The Body’s Midnight text presents dilemmas of family, aging, relationships, and health diagnosis fragility — all embedded in the geographic and cultural complexity of a cross-country exploration. Anne and David, a long-term couple and the core duo of the story, are on a trip from California to Minnesota to witness the birth of their first grandchild. There is an immediate indication of an underlying, yet unspoken, tension: even though their dialogue has all the markers of the fun tug-and-pull of a loving relationship, there are little pieces of concern and abnormality that let us know that is not their usual cross-country excursion.
And as the play moves through — no spoilers here! — there is a linking of grand geological sites, park rangers, family phone calls, and mythic characters, all addressing the themes of aging, choice, health and change. Exquisitely interwoven.
Tira and I have known each other for a ‘few’ years, and I have seen and read other produced Palmquist plays, including Two Degrees, Age of Bees & And Then They Fell. I immediately noted key similarities in this work — a balance of the personal, imaginary, poetic and factual in a way that keeps the mind moving while still hitting emotional truth.
After talking to Tira about this particular play, I was struck by how she allowed real events to establish the foundation and then layered other ‘realities’ and fiction to amplify the themes. Writers are often told, “Write what you know,” but even with that dictate, the unique aspects of a script often come from research, discoveries and creativity. This is a great example!
Playwright Tira Palmquist
So, my first question? What was the impetus for the play? There are a couple of answers…
Tira told me that she had a doctor’s visit and a diagnosis that started her thinking: not the same issue as Anne’s, but enough to shake the norm. That, coupled with the challenging notion of ‘aging,’ brought the possible character and plot into place.
“In 2018, as the play first came to me, I thought about this woman getting a diagnosis, and then making this journey and having a bucket list for this adventure: trying to memorialize things and hoping against hope to make them permanent,” she said.
A family component also provided context: a few years before the writing, Tira’s mother had a mysterious and complex health downturn.
“In her 70s, my mother started to exhibit symptoms of what was initially misdiagnosed as a more common dementia, but an MRI confirmed, later, that she had had several strokes (probably what are known as ‘silent strokes’) that caused significant damage to important structures of her brain. I’ve had some significant migraines in my life that have mimicked transient ischemic attacks (sometimes seen as precursors to major strokes). The idea that something like this could happen to me, could rob me of my ability to use and appreciate language, was, frankly, terrifying,” Tira continued.
So, yes, Anne does echo Tira’s life experience — and the play deals with these fears and trials — but along the way… well, Tira expands relationships and environments that further reveal Anne’s journey.
Sonal Shah and Keliher Walsh Photo by Brian Hashimoto
Using her own experience of driving across the country, Tira fosters two particular aspects of travel to let Anne change. First, travel’s physical and mental impacts: “I am inspired by the way that travel (and longer drives) encourages a kind of patience and meditative attention to the world around you. Being willing to be surprised by the world rather than rushing through it,” she said.
With the travel disruptions, she allows her characters to veer off the planned path and dive into unusual locations that are surprising and allow for new realizations. There are deliberate jumps to locations that are not perfectly on the same highway; and there are jumps to memory locations that echo the past. This dance keeps the reader/audience in a mindset that discovers the roots of the relationships and story.
Her other use of travel is the specific locations: metaphorical representations that amplify Anne’s concerns and represent ideas about the planet’s fragility. Locations include the Grand Canyon, Glacier National Park, rest stops, and, of course, the Pando.
I admit, I did not know what the Pando was.
The Pando is a network of ash trees in Utah that are genetically the same tree, and what seems like individual trees are actually family branches sprouting from the giant lateral root of the parent. This is similar to the concept of character repetition and modification in the play.
“The inspiration for using the Pando in the play was actually a happy accident,” said Tira. “I started researching ‘disappearing places’ and mapping where these places would be along the route Anne and David would travel, and I just happened to stumble on information about this amazing place.”
Accidental finding. Well, maybe not “accidental.” As Tira described, it’s more the subconscious finding its way into a deep engagement with the core themes.
Another key to Anne’s core journey is her husband David’s embrace and care. I was curious about the sense of familiarity, and I gathered that there might be similarities in Tira’s own relationship.
“Well, the characters of Anne and David are drawn heavily from my husband and me — the kinds of conversations we have, the love language we’ve developed, the way I am his ‘monster’ and he is my ‘robot.’” (These are the quirky terms of endearment that they have for each other in the play.) “And while the catalyst for writing the play was a health scare I had, there’s not much else that is my particular story. The more that Anne, David and the other characters took shape, the more this play found its shape and purpose.”
Keliher Walsh andJonathan Nichols-Navarro Photo by Brian Hashimotoo
And the play does have a shape and purpose. For me, it felt like a challenge to understand, forgive, and maintain in the chaos of existence — but in a positive way.
Director Jessica Kubzansky described the journey as an “existential climb up a mountaintop,” which I agree with. It was lovely to see Jessica working during my brief visit to a rehearsal: the actors were just at the almost-memorized place, finding the details. Jessica was shaping the patterns and exceptions on the stage in ways to reinforce the “vast beauty” and the “crisis of connection” in the different environments. The actors — Keliher Walsh as Anne, Jonathan Nichols-Navarro as David, Sonal Shah as the daughter Katie and various other roles, and Ryan Garcia as son-in-law Wolf and also multiple roles — all were creating exceptional moments for the dance of dialogue, bringing all the voices together to remind the audience of the journey.
Director Jessica Kubzansky
Since this is a playwrights’ blog, there are a few points to highlight about getting the play written, read, developed and produced that might be illuminating. Tira is great at generating, then submitting, and then developing relationships that build ground for her work. She is also persistent: she keeps on track through the many steps and processes that may be needed to get to the desired end state.
As mentioned, she got the impetus for the play in 2018 and then began the initial draft in 2019, working through pages and ideas. The second inspiration or deep dive was at the Tao House in northern California (one of Eugene O’Neill’s homes). At that writing residency, she found additional inspiration from O’Neill’s plays and “found ways to thread those in as homage to him and that beautiful place.”
Next, as in many writer’s journeys, there was an opportunity for a deeper development at the Seven Devils Playwrights Conference in June of 2021. Tira was the Guest Playwright, and she felt this was “a huge step forward in the play — figuring out more about how reality and surreality could work in the play, to find the ‘rules’ of the world, and discover how to make some of the wilder poetry of the play feel authentic and earned, and not merely decorative.”
Also, the Boston Court was part of the process with their 2022 Playwright Group. That group gives an artist a year-long development process that provides the time to foster and deepen the world and characters of the play. This led to a public reading in April of 2023 at Boston Court’s New Play Festival – the first reading in front of a live audience! Jessica Kubzansky did a week of table work and rehearsal. Tira was especially grateful for her support, particularly Jessica’s fierce defense of how the play “plays with time and reality” and for providing support for expanding the poetry and magic of the play. As always, Jessica asked important questions about how The Body’s Midnight world operates and how that world operates on the characters. When I spoke with Jessica, she mentioned the rich challenges embedded in Anne and David’s relationship and how their realities intersect and collide, leading to emotional fruition.
And the reading? Tira said: “I really had no idea how the play would be received by an audience. I mean, Up until that point, I’d only experienced the play via Zoom readings and workshops… The reaction and responses really blew me away, and showed me, for the first time, that his was a play. A play that was important to other people, not just to me.”
Ryan Garcia, Sonal Shah Photo by Brian Hashimoto
It is now a year after the reading and it looks to be a full and beautiful production. The set design, bringing to mind the various natural locations, was just evolving when I saw the rehearsal. Now, I need to experience the full depth of The Body’s Midnight. Hope you do, too.
One more quote from Tira (and I’m sure writers can relate…):
“My writing process is, at best, chaotic. I have learned a couple things about myself: I can no longer just start writing with a kind of whim. I have to have the play sort of… gestate in my brain and in my body for a long time. I do a fair amount of very unorganized organizing work — as I said before, figuring out the beginning, middle, end, having a kind of shape or structure in mind — and then, when there’s a kind of critical mass of the play, I start to write. Usually, this first draft is pretty quick. I don’t honestly recall how long the first draft of The Body’s Midnight took, but I think it was a couple of months. Then there are moments of time and distance — returning to the play with new eyes, or with a new inspiration or realization. That recursive part of the process can take a few years.”
“The Body’s Midnight,” a co-production of IAMA Theatre Company and Boston Court Pasadena, opens April 27 and runs through May 26, 2024 at Boston Court. For tickets and information visit www.iamatheatre.com.
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