All posts by TiffanyAntone

Surround yourselves…

…with chocolate.

Or, more importantly, surround yourself with friends so delicious and inspiring that it makes you completely forget about your incessant quest to CONSUME ALL THE CHOCOLATE.

Because these people will help you get up off the couch.
They will teach you how to “Hang in there” and write your best stuff.
And they will tell you when you’ve had enough chocolate, and it’s time for you to get up and create something already.

I moved to AZ three damn years ago, and although I miss (like mad) my writer gals and guys, my creative crazies, and my “breeder” besties, I have managed to surround myself with enough awesome people in small-town-AZ, that I haven’t lost my mind and become an off-the-rails-choco-holic… yet.

But I miss the energy and motivation this crazy city gave me… the theatres on every corner, the actors and directors ready to air out your work for the price of a pizza and a share in the throb of theatrical magic.   I miss having conversations with peers who write like motherf***ers in the hopes of someday paying the bills with their words.

Which is why visiting LA has become pure joy, smiles,  and all-the-things-I-didn’t-get-to-enjoy-when-I-lived-here-because-I-was-working-my-fool-butt-off-trying-to-just-SURVIVE…

But I do miss the throb.

So surround yourself with inspiring friends and culture, and enjoy this crazy, blasted expensive, sunshining, billboards-on-every-corner city… and enjoy the chocolate.

 

 

Accepting the “Not Quite”

Sometimes things don’t work out the way you’d hoped.

Some of you may know that I had designs on jumping into the lip-synch craze with a bunch of fellow female playwrights.  I was supposed to be filming this Sunday… downtown… but there’s a MARATHON, my choreographer got ill, and I had to make the tough decision to cancel postpone the project.

But I want to take a moment to talk about the theatre that was going to host us this Sunday – The Los Angeles Theatre Center!

I worked at the LATC from 2008 – 2009.  I came on as an intern, and then Artistic Director Jose Luis Valenzuela gave me the wonderful opportunity to stay on as Literary Manager.  I learned so much working at that beautiful theatre, and I fell in love with their mission of producing work by theatrically under-represented peoples.

And this Spring, they are featuring FOUR new works by female playwrights!

  • Shades * World Premiere*  March 21 – April 14th
    Written by Paula J. Caplan. Directed by Jon Lawrence RiveraIt’s 1997, the Hale-Bopp comet zooms overhead, casting its magical glow over a time of relative peace in the U.S. An American family is both haunted and strengthened by its generations of service at home and on the front lines. The politics of war, race, and sex collide with echoes of the past in this compelling drama about what happens to family ties when oppositional politics threaten to tear them apart. Witnesses to life’s fleeting nature, each must take action now or risk losing all. A play about discovering the path to love, laughter, and even some peace beneath the ruins of war. Recipient of the Inaugural Pen & Brush Award for Playwriting.
  • Habitat  *L.A. Premiere* April 12 – May 12th
    Written by Judith Thompson. Directed by Jose Luis ValenzuelaJanet and her mother Margaret both live on Mapleview Lanes – the perfect neighborhood until Lewis Chance buys a house on their street to open a group home for troubled adolescents. Raine, unable to respond emotionally when her mother dies, finds herself at this group home, in a community that has little tolerance for its newest residents. The ensuing battle – over whether the group home stays or not – allows Raine to re-awaken her emotions through rage, and a political will she didn’t know that she possessed.
  • The Anatomy of Gazellas  *World Premiere* April 25 – May 12th
    Written by Janine Salinas Schoenberg. Directed by Jon Lawrence RiveraAlex, a mysterious teen, arrives at a transitional house for young women run by a charismatic Evangelical leader. As the two women struggle to understand each other, Doña Lydia becomes more determined to save the young girl from herself.  But Alex has already devised her own plan for salvation with the help of her imaginary friends.
  • Beautiful *World Premiere* May 23 – June 16th
    Written and performed by Jozanne Marie. Directed by Geoff RivasBeautiful is a solo play about a young girl, an island, and a secret that begs to be told. Told through the spoken word poetry of international artist Jozanne Marie, this harrowing coming of age story will stay with you long after you leave the theater.

Please support this amazing theatre, and enjoy the amazing shows, the beautiful interior, and the four fabulous stages of the Los Angeles Theatre Center!

~Tiffany Antone ~

Christmas Blessings

I have a confession to make – my initial reaction at blogging over Christmas was “What?  But I’ve got candy to eat and hug family and watch Holiday movies on repeat!! ”  But then I realized that it might be the perfect time to sit down and tap out some sentiment… I mean, last time I was blogging for the LAFPI, I was pretty much crying in my beer – feeling very overwhelmed and under-creative.

Then I co-produced a short play festival with my The@trics partner, and my groove came back with a vengeance!

There really is a lot to be said for donning the producer cap once in a while – it helps alleviate that dark and bitter sense of atrophy that a playwright can develop under the right circumstance (I’m broke, I don’t have the job I want, I don’t have time to write, I am tired of eating cereal for diner… you know what I’m talking about here).  Producing gets you our of the house, our of your pajamas, and away from the mini-bar.  You are busy!  You are working on a completed project!  You are part of something that is actually-by-God coming to fruition!

And it is empowering!

But it wasn’t just the “productivity” that pulled me out of my funk – it was the impact of the production itself that was inspiring!   Here were plays that were written to raise money for a local non-profit. Here were plays that by there very writing, mattered!  They weren’t just something written to suit a playwright’s fancies… they were written to get butts in seats so that the Coalition for Compassion and Justice in Prescott, AZ, could fund their poverty relief programs… these plays were written to help people… a purpose which, combined with all the creativity and passion behind/within/around it, reminded me of the power of theatre.

And that, dear reader, is what I needed to remember- what I needed to feel again, in my bones… I needed to feel the hum and throb and pull of the “why” of it all.

For why else do we write, but to make a difference?  Be it through laughter or revelation, catharsis comes to a hungry audience through the collaboration of many impassioned creationists… And I finally feel the passion coming back… driving me to sit back down and create!

 

Other Hats

I have to apologize – I’m in a real artistic funk and I leaked some of that frustration in Monday’s post.  Rather than spend the week whining (isn’t that a seductive plan), I’m going to attempt to treat your time with care.  After all, if you visit this site, chances are you’re some kind of theatrician as well and already well-know the challenges of this life.

So let’s talk about sprinkling yourself across mediums… and the wearing-thin of it.

I started a new blog – it’s called Twaddle Squawk and is devoted to fun opinionation.  I’ve assembled a terrific group of talented writers, and we will publish our third issue next week.

I write for that blogzine – I’ve got all kinds of things to say there – but I am not writing full-length plays.

I’ve also been producing new play festivals in AZ… it’s exciting to me and I enjoy wearing the producer hat (most of the time) because the results are tangible.  I have some major say in what happens and I usually write my own 10-minute play for each, so that Playwright Tiffany is bearing the benefits of Producer Tiffany’s hard work…

I write for those festivals because I know the result will get produced – but I am not writing full-length plays.

I’m organizing theatre workshops, rounding up students and such – because it’s solid and fun, and teaching feeds my soul!  I will spend these workshops giving of my experience and knowledge, sharing my path with young aspirants…

I will teach the sh** out of those classes – but I am not writing full-length plays.

But I wonder – With these other creative outlets eating up my time  – am I cultivating creative growth, or am I allowing the feeling of completion and ideas-come-to-fruition-ness (via producing and teaching) get in the way of my passion:  writing plays (without any guarantee that anything will come of them or not) and letting my muse run wild?

For the reality of the artist’s life is that we are constantly besieged by the “real” world – demanding we meet our real world needs (like eating, paying rent, getting our knee tended to when it’s busted – that sort of thing) – that we can start to lose faith in the solvency of our dreams.

I used to believe that my plays had no chance at being ignored – that if I worked hard enough at my craft, I would certainly succeed – but here I am at a place where I find myself exclaiming “Certainly I’ve worked hard enough to be further along than this!”  – and it leaves me grumpy and feeling stuck.

So, I don my other creative hats and revel in the completeness of different-than-playwriting tasks… and mourn the creative zeal that used to light my fire so determinedly.

Laid Up

Anyone else out there suffering from “I’m-not-doing-enough-itus?”

I hurt my knee.  I don’t know how I did it, but it was the third such lay-me-up-for-a-while injury sustained in September.  I’m not a clumsy person either, so three Wham-Bam-Mother-F**ing-OUCH’s in one month must mean something…   or so everyone has been telling me.

The standard response to my “I hurt my knee” hobble show has been “This is because you do too much.  You need to slow your roll, lady!”   Only, don’t they understand that I have plays to write, shows to get on Broadway, and professorial employment to procure?

… or, that none of that is happening right now anyway?  In spite of my constant busy-ness?

So I’m trying to take it easy on the couch while I wait for this Thursday’s apt with the orthopedist (hopefully the thing wrong with my knee isn’t that dire!) but it’s hard!  It’s hard because I’m so wrapped up in my part-time-panic that I don’t want to slow down… lest the life I’m trying find get too far ahead for me to ever catch up with.

Except that I did hurt my knee and I’ve been forced to spend way too many days on the couch like a total bum, no matter my anxiety.

And since I’m confessing – I’m not-writing again, which sucks.  The frustration and aggravation are paralyzing me lately – the thought that I’ll get stuck here in the not-really-where-I-want-to-be pit is paralyzing me even more – and yet, I’m so tired that I find myself spending my bum-knee-couch-time reading or playing video games instead of the “Gee, if only I had more time I’d be SOOOOO writing my greatest hits right now!” mantra I’ve been humming the past few months.

So – what’s the point of this whine-fest?  It’s that I need more wine… and pages.  I need to get my butt in gear, but I don’t know how.  It’s not writer’s block, it’s honest to goodness depression and anxiety.

And I didn’t need a busted knee in order to admit that.

Totally Worth It!

I’ve been running around like a chicken with my head cut of for the past four months and I’ve felt the pinch in a number of areas – sleep(!), diet, patience, nerves, peace and balance – but the details of the “then” aren’t as important to the posting of the now… the great happy “Ahhhh” I’m reveling in tonight, as it all finally wrapped up.

I get to sleep in tomorrow and the only thing I HAVE to do after I drag myself from bed is add up receipts and get my oil changed.

Two things.

I only have to do two things tomorrow.

I can’t wait.

And I’m heading into this much-needed day of repose after a hugely successful final performance at the summer camp.  These kids knocked it out of the park!  Not only did they jump head first into Viewpoints, Suzuki, and the myriad other techniques and challenges we presented them with, but they also soaked up every moment with joy.  They trusted each other, listened to one another, and they created a completely original theatre piece as an ensemble that was terrifically moving.

My partner and I were ecstatic, watching from the light booth, as proud as we could be, absolutely bursting at the seams with pride.

I feel good.

I feel so good.

I’m so grateful to the kids for invigorating me, for reminding me why I do what I do, and for showing me the magic that can happen when actors listen, trust, and explore together.

It was inspiring.

So after I catch up on sleep, eating, and yoga, I’m going to get right back to writing… the muse is awake and happy.  Working with new artists has proven again just how much I love teaching, how important it is to share our passion with the future, and how wonderful we can be when we work together.

Creationists

I know the word “Creationists” can stir emotions, but I’m not talking about religion today – I’m talking about the theater, and more specifically talking about young artists in the theater.

I’m co-teaching an acting camp with 10-16 year olds, and they’re blowing my mind – because no one is telling them “No”, or “You’re not right for the part” or “You can’t do that!”… and they’re enjoying every minute.

They’re enjoying every minute of “Yes.”

And I hope the world gives them more a lot more “Yes’s” as they grow… because it’s easy to get wrapped up in all the “No”s, “No Thank You”s and “Not Yet”s…. it’s easy to let them add up and weigh you down.

Lately I’ve been dreaming of driving off into a new town, new life, new everything – not because this life is awful (it’s definitely NOT – thank goodness), but because lately I’ve felt like I don’t know how to move this life forward with purposeful motion… motion in the direction I so aspire to move.

So I’m practicing the art of not worrying about it… of just sitting with the present for a change… I’m sitting with the joy of teaching young dreamers.   And they’re encouraging me to let go of the “No”s I’ve got sitting on my shoulders and just get back to playing.

Because that’s what we do – we dare to play…

Enjoying the Howl

Short plays… who loves short plays?  I’ve been working with them a lot lately.  I just wrapped up a female playwrights festival in Prescott (next year’s submission process will open up to LAFPI writers – so stay in touch with us on Facebook), I’m in the middle of developing another short play fest for December, and I’m writing a short play each month this summer for HowlRound.com’s Here and Now Project.

The funny thing is that I used to hate short plays – I didn’t feel like there was ever enough time in a 10 minute play to get the story told.  Maybe it’s because I was trying to say too much, or maybe it’s because I was still a new writer and I didn’t really understand the value of brevity.  Whatever the cause, my aversion to the form has melted away and I am now a major fan… because it’s seriously challenging to write a whole play in 10 minutes!  Much of the time I wind up thinking “What comes next” at the close of ten pages rather than satisfaction and catharsis.  However, I’m finding that when I do strike it right, the sense of accomplishment is delicious.

And when I watched this year’s female playwright’s fest in Prescott – From the Mouths of Babes – I felt such happiness as the completion of the whole… made up of each individual playwright’s part – that I could scarce believe I used to loathe the 10 minute play format.

But maybe what’s most rewarding for me is the producibility of 10 minute plays.  They’re easy to rehearse, easy to stage, and audiences get a kick out of seeing new writers in small doses… almost like a dinner party with lots of appetizers.  I now totally understand why theater companies put out so many calls for short plays – they get to know new writers without committing to an expensive full-length production – something that can be frustrating as a playwright, but makes sense from a company standpoint.

Also, I’ve grown really tired of wrestling with the eternal “WHEN is  SOMEONE going to PRODUCE my plays!?” ennui .  The thing about producing on my own is that I feel like I’m actually doing something other than waiting.  And hopefully it’s satisfying to the other playwrights getting produced as well.

In any case, it’s an interesting way to start the week… reflecting on the magic of short plays and the satisfaction of seeing them on their feet.  Hopefully the  Here and Now Project plays will see some stage life soon too – either way, it’s been great to work on so many 10-minute plays this summer… and it’s left me feeling really good about finishing up the full-length that’s been haunting me for the past several months – it’s a sense of accomplishment that I was sorely missing.

Because it’s really important to remind yourself that you don’t just have to sit around and wait…

Did you hear that?

Stop.  Waiting.  Now.

🙂

A Tingling Sojourn

It’s the end of my blogging week, and I want to talk (finally) a bit about time…  How we spend so much of it waiting, making excuses, rushing around from unimportant (in the scheme of things) task to unimportant task – how we put so many wonderful moments on the backburner because it’s not vital to our day-to-day existences…

We’ve got to stop that nonsense.

Cason and I spent our final “Jane Doe in NY!” vacation day puttering around Park Slope – there was a wonderful street fair with plenty of good food and excellent knick-knack browsing to be had.  The weather was gorgeous.

And the art was everywhere.

I need to stop getting sucked into my “Oh-my-God-I’m-so-Broke!” panic and remember to make more art.

I need to write more plays.

When I moved back to AZ (almost 2 years ago now – yikes!) it was never with the intention to stay as long as I have.  I was unemployed, beat down, and depressed as all get out about my “Why can’t I just EMERGE ALREADY” Emerging-Playwright status.  So I took my Arizona Sojourn as an excuse to hide out, lick my wounds, and heal.

Well, the healing has happened – it’s time for me to get back on the hamster wheel.

And that’s not to say I’ve been lazy – just the opposite in fact – I’ve been insanely busy.  But it’s primarily been a producerly and survivalist sort of busy… I haven’t done a lot of writing or art-making of my own, and this weekend was just the right thing to help me refocus and get my sails back up again.

Because it’s incredibly validating when a theatre company reads your work and decides to produce it – there is so much involved in theatre making, it is a tremendous compliment to know that someone besides you and the non-producing back-clappers think your work is worthy of an audience.  It’s why we write plays, after all.

There is also something incredibly inspiring about visiting a city full of artists fighting to make their art seen/heard/count.

We saw Fuerza Bruta this week and the sheer spectacle of the thing had my imagination spinning with possibilities – my playwright brain was in visual ecstasy.

I walked into shops full of hand-crafted clever arts and wanted to run home and start building pieces of my own.

I have really missed the visual and theatrical feasting that the East and West Coasts provide… and I am inspired to bring my reclaimed whimsy and dedication back home with me with a vengeance, now that the “licking-my-wounds” sojourn is over and I’m feeling the Muse stretch her wings again.

Thank you CAKE Productions, and thank you New York!

~Tiffany

 

Piece of CAKE

I have to admit, I was incredibly nervous to see my show Thursday night at the 4th St. Theatre at the New York Theatre Workshop.  I think it’s to do with the fact that it was a completely new experience for me and my little playwright brain couldn’t grasp the reality of it all- aside from the Samuel French Off-Off Broadway festival I had participated in 4 years ago, this was my first production in NY… and it was completely different and amazing for a whole-exciting-bunch of all new reasons.

But when I walked into the theatre, I was greeted by a voiceless director who was exhausted from the last minute tech-insanity, but who also seemed really happy with the work… so I settled in, took a breath, and let go.

And it was wonderful!

The play began with an entirely different interpretation of the first scene than I’d imagined (there was dancing and shadow play!) and it completely surprised me – but in a really great way.  You see, I’d written this play to be interpreted and designed – The text is the text is the text, but the staging and design of the play are not strongly indicated, so a director/design team can (and should) have fun manifesting the metaphorical nature of the events of the play… which of course runs the risk of someone getting a little too auteurish with the script, which in turn might make me cringe someday, but the fact is that I like writing for designers and directors and actors.  I like giving them a jumping off point – dialogue, plot, a lot of visual challenges, and room to stretch their creative wings.

And I really loved the design that CAKE Productions and their director, Paul Urcioli, created.

The set was all white, the back wall moved as we dove deeper and deeper into Jane’s nightmare, the many doors provided funny and poignant entrances and exits, and the lighting was really cool.

And the actors were amazing.

Having seen the show twice before in LA, I was prepared for the embraced wackiness of the play, but the actors and direction in this production actually grounded the play more than I’d seen before and it brought a wonderfully genuine gravity to the play.  The play leans to the absurd, but Jane’s crisis is a very real problem… the humor and pathos was really well-balanced in this production, and it drove the plays meaning all the way home – at least I thought so.

And I enjoyed the surprises – having worked on the play for so long, I’m very familiar with the text, but hearing it aloud again after the 4 years since the last production was a treat because I had done some rewrites.  There were a few places I had honestly forgotten that I’d rewritten, so I found myself leaning in a bit more and being surprised by my own work.  Then there were a few places where the director’s choices changed the way a scene or moment played and I thought “Wow – that was totally not how I’d imagined it/seen it done before!” but in a really interesting and purposeful way that served the play well.

I walked out of the theatre feeling like a proud and honored playwright, like I’d just been to the interior of my play – past my own expectations and further into the world of Jane Doe.

And I can’t wait to see it again tonight.

~Tiffany